Even raw talent doesn’t guarantee that we’ll be successful 100% of the time. And for some of us, that failure leaves a lasting impression on our psyche. However, by incorporating mindfulness strategies into your daily routine, you’ll be better equipped to control your self-doubt, and quite possibly position yourself for higher rates of success.
Failure Distorts Reality
Failing can make our goals appear to be more difficult—or even impossible—to achieve. According to Scientific American, Massachusetts Institute of Technology Neuroscientist, Earl Miller, found that monkeys kept track of their recent successes and failures. When the primates were successful, the event led to improved neural processing that motivated them to perform better in the following trial. Conversely, if they made mistakes, even after nearly mastering a task, they performed poorly the next time around. In other words, these monkeys were “thrown off” by their mistakes instead of learning from them. While in many ways we’ve evolved past our primal ancestors, self-doubt is still in our DNA.
By and large, failure isn’t often punished; it simply goes unacknowledged. Successes, on the other hand, are generally awarded. When this occurs, people receive positive social feedback (think verbal “congratulations” or tangible prizes, such as trophies), which leads them to have a spike in dopamine—a neurotransmitter associated with pleasurable feelings. Because our brains and bodies like the blast of this mood-boosting chemical, we’re more likely to repeat the behavior that led to success. Put simply: success breeds success.
Naturally, people who have experienced failure also want positive reinforcement for their efforts. However, when people are ignored after a failure, fear of not receiving social feedback creates an aversion to the task. While it may not seem like a few affirming words would make that much of a difference, research published in PLOS ONE found that social rewards have the same positive effects as receiving cash.
Furthermore, a recent study found that, even when a basic emotion (such as fear) is experienced, emotional and cognitive processes can’t be dissociated. This means that failure generates fear, which then causes stress when the task is attempted again. Therefore, coping with an error from a particular task is often difficult because of the emotions and thoughts that are attached to that activity.
It’s important to remember that fear tends to distort your perception of your abilities, even when your skill level hasn’t changed. If you envision yourself failing rather than succeeding, you’re more likely to fail. To combat those feeling of defeat, use a mindfulness strategy before and during your next challenging activity.
Ways To Overcome Fear Of Failure
Visualize yourself being successful next time you approach an activity that you’ve associated with failure. By reframing how situations are viewed, mindfulness helps you overcome the potential disappointments or embarrassments that are commonly associated with making mistakes. To take control of your fear, start by:
Forgetting the past: Remind yourself that your previous failures have nothing to do with your current attempt.
Remembering the six Ps: Proper planning prevents poor performance. This is to say, don’t wait until the last minute to prepare. The more time you give yourself, the less anxiety you’ll have.
Reframing: Fear often comes from the “what-ifs.” But, what if you reframe your past attempts as learning experiences rather than failures?
Making a plan B: Creating an alternative course of action gives you an opportunity to reach your goal in a different way.
In order to be successful, it’s helpful to let go of the stigma attached to failing. The people who have had the most achievements sometimes are the ones who have made the most attempts.
Lead By Example
Children are constantly learning from the adults in their lives. But when parents set the example that mistakes are unacceptable, children perceive failure negatively. Some children’s fear of failure can be so pervasive that it impacts other aspects of their lives.
A recent study found that the manner in which a parent reacts to a failure or mistake ultimately affects how their child learns. For example, if a parent believes that their child’s failures are debilitating as opposed to enhancing, then the child is more likely to think that his or her intelligence is “fixed” instead of “malleable.” Research has shown that this factor significantly impacts a child’s level of motivation and willingness to learn. As a parent, it’s imperative to keep a positive “failure mindset” around your child. This means that, instead of focusing on your child’s current abilities, focus on what he or she can learn.
Mindfulness practices in schools can also help children see failure as an opportunity for improvement. To create an atmosphere that allows errors at home and at school, Childmind.org recommends that parents should incorporate mindfulness into a child's failures through a step-by-step process that includes:
Showing empathy
Making yourself the model
Creating teachable moments
Allowing failure
Alleviate Anxiety
The fear of failure is powerful enough to cause psychosomatic side effects, such as fatigue, insomnia, and shortness of breath—all of which make a challenging situation even more difficult. A study published in the US National Library of Medicine found that, by incorporating emotion regulation strategies when fear occurs, you can successfully limit the cognitive impairment that results from feelings of anxiety.
Although no method of mindfulness fits everybody, research has proven that using mindfulness can reduce anxiety. Find the techniques that work for you, and start alleviating your fear of failure. If you’re prone to stress, it’s also recommended that you exercise regularly and avoid alcohol consumption.
Mindfulness In Every Aspect Of Life
Whether you’re just off your game or you’re taking a chance on a new activity, try applying mindfulness in your everyday life to diminish the anxiety that surrounds failure. If you would like to learn more about bringing mindfulness into your life and/or organization, contact Mindfulness Strategies today.